Hope is the Beginning!

Hello wonderful, fearful, armor-bearing, sword-wielding, women of God! Don’t forget who you are and who the Almighty Maker of Heaven and Earth created you to be at the beginning of time.

The world is constantly and relentlessly dedicated to trying to put you down, tear you up, or even just make you forget the warrior at the forefront of who you are. Don’t let it have one millimeter!

I’m realizing that a great deal of you might not be aware of one of the greatest testimonies of my life and wanted to document it here so if you’ve heard it, I apologize, but this was the origination of the woman I am right now and I never want to forget.

Over thirty years ago (wow, where does the time go?!), I was three years into my marriage and had two beautiful boys that God enabled me to stay at home and be a full-time Mommy. I didn’t realize it then, but those days were some of the happiest, joy-filled times I would have to treasure in my life. Yes, tears are trying to spill from my eyes now, but I have to get through this post!

Lesson here?  Embrace the season of life you are currently in. God might be trying to teach you a lifelong lesson or reach people around you He’s trying to reach as well. Whatever you have been through, wherever you go, remember He will be with you That’s a promise straight from Deuteronomy 31:6

Anyway, I digress because it was at this time in my life that I had woke up in the morning with double vision. Something about that gets your attention and I went to the doctor A.S.A.P! I’m not going to focus on the symptoms  I was having but will give some key points to help you see how serious this was.

I had the battery of medical tests given along with the conclusive  MRI’s and spinal taps which over the course of a year and a half led to the conclusion that I had Multiple Sclerosis.

Before the doctors would diagnose me, I would have bouts of major depression, confusion, memory loss, incontinence, balance issues that made me use a cane, and more double vision.  I refuse to give any glory to the enemy for the things he was doing to my body.

I had gone through a year of having various symptoms over and over again until the pivotal moment when I had finally gotten an official diagnosis from a doctor that had a practice in Wichita Falls, TX.

There is no physical, man-made cure or drug to make Multiple Sclerosis go away, so I was totally relying on the Lord. He was the only one that gave me hope, but I also needed more than hope. Faith would be the powerful, life-changing element that would be needed, but I didn’t know a thing about it.

At this point, I believe I had hope, but it was more of wishful thinking looking back at it. I found a scripture that told me, “And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
Romans 5:5

I had gone to bed for the night and was saying my nighttime prayers to Father God when I was talking to him about the diagnosis that was given to me. You see, thankfully I remembered as a little girl how Jesus would say to His disciples not to keep the children from coming to him for such as belongs the kingdom of heaven. I remembered the scriptures of Jesus healing people that came to him but I had to learn that He also wanted to heal me.

I didn’t need to learn only that, but I also had to learn that it was already done through the power of His sacrifice on the cross, coupled with the whippings He took upon His back. Isaiah 53:5, 1Peter 2:24.

Back my bedtime praying: while praying, I also saw myself at the edge of a cliff, wondering if Jesus and God were truly real along with feeling that if they weren’t real, I thought, “If I don’t believe Jesus can heal me, how do I know I’m saved?” It became clear and concise to me at that moment.

I remember at that time thinking maybe I need more faith. How do I get more of it? Where does it come from? Will it really make any difference in my life that seemed so unsure and unsteady now? That’s when it happened. Something that would shape and change my life in ways I can’t even begin to tell you. I audibly heard His voice say. “It’s that same faith that got you saved that will heal you.”

No lightning. No thunderclaps. A sweet calming peace fell over my spirit lulling me to sleep and not hear the loud, questioning, and at times incriminating accusations of, “How can this be? What are you going to do? What can you do?” reverberate in my soul.

Now, I would like to tell you that I instantly felt different, but feelings can be misleading and I have learned that we are not to trust feelings. They are fleeting and not totally reliable.

What I did do, was get out my bible and begin to look up scriptures of what God says faith is and how He is able to do the impossible in a person’s life. I began putting them on index cards and taping them all over my house to quote them aloud whenever my eyes would see them. This turned to memorization of them and quoting them whenever I was feeling low or vulnerable in a declarative way.

I would also like to tell you that my healing happened instantaneously, but it didn’t. There was a particular moment I remember when I was singing a solo with choir backup to a song titled “Waymaker”. I would sing, “How do you know He’s a waymaker? What has he done for you? Has he brought you out? Without a doubt?” all of this at the time when I had to use a cane to be able to walk!

A couple of months had passed and I had encouraged my husband, Rick to take a missionary trip to help build a church in Mexico. One evening, at a service with the missionaries and home church people there in Mexico, a Mexican gave a prophetic word that said I was being healed right then. Well, right then, in Wichita Falls, TX, I was throwing up so much that one of my neighbors who was helping us by keeping an eye on me and my little boys was thinking of taking me to the hospital! The reason I tell you this here is that as I stated before, there was no pinpoint time that healing manifested, but I believe it happened because several things needed to be worked out by God for healing to come. Looking back now, I think I was throwing up the last residuals that Satan was holding onto my body with and he couldn’t take it anymore.

Without a doubt, I would say the pivotal thing that helped me the most was the scriptural confessions I would read and declare over my body. I have now been healed for 30 years! At first, the enemy would try to give me symptoms, but I wouldn’t be fearful of them and continued to take my scriptural medicine until they left. Another good thing about my scriptural meds was they were without all the symptoms that medical medicines deliver with their cure!

A list of the scriptures I stood on will be added to another page of this website as soon as my little dog, Samson, leaves me alone to do it. He’s barking right now for me to take him outside!